A Lifetime Horoscope?

So I was flipping through our local paper, The Salt Lake Tribune, this morning while having a few moments of quiet in the restroom. Alright, I'm kidding - the restroom was filled with both my 2.5 year old trying to brush his teeth/eardrums with Thomas the Train toothpaste and a 100-pound Labrador hoping to get her incisors scrubbed by a toddler. Amongst the craziness, I came across an article about how more kids nationally are born on Wednesday and here in the lovely state of Utah we birth more on Tuesdays. What I found to be more interesting than the straight statistics was what astrologers believe each day of the week means. Here's the breakdown courtesy of The Tribune and Salt Lake Astrologer Anne Windsor:

Monday: The moon, associated with being sensitive to his or her environment and needs of others.
Tuesday: Mars, associated with being very active, a self starter, and having the tendency to be a little confrontational.
Wednesday: Mercury, associated with needing a lot of activity, being curious, and restless.
Thursday: Jupiter, associated with being outgoing, having a focus on the future, and being optimistic but prone to delivering or taking on too much.
Friday: Venus, associated with liking to have things pleasant, enjoying good food, being possessive of things, but a little lazy and indulgent.
Saturday: Saturn, more responsible, focused on long-term accomplishments, and can be more somber.
Sunday: The sun, which means they want to be the center of attention, are very creative, warm, and generous.

I could buy this breakdown as my little terror was born smack-dab in the middle of a Tuesday, and was destroying the house as I was contemplating this article. When I thought more about it, I could see some flaws. I was born a few minutes into a Monday - and I don't see myself as a card-carrying member of the Sierra Club, but I do get pretty sensitive with interpersonal relationships. I dunno, I think some more investigation will have to take place before I'm sold on the "day of the week" horoscope.

Whatta think? Cosmic crystal gazing or fortune-teller phoey?